Because without her

I would have never seen the green eyes of a giantess
or the insanity of a Russian beach
or know the simple delicacy that lies between four day old sheets and a frayed phone cord
or how far I am now from who I was when she would still wear black pants.

Because without her these questions wouldn't be asked,
wouldn't be thought, wouldn't be here
but more so because without her, i would still be inside of a small cave
with a gnarled claw as my left hand and a baggie of potpourri for my right.

Because without her, I'm still without him and right now there is nothing aside from
dead words and fake heat, neither of which are right for me.